Throughout life, I have had a fascination with both philosophy and psychology, especially the interplay of both. I've always wondered how the brain works and what makes me, me. Why do I have certain thoughts? Why do I react in certain ways etc.? Two areas that have especially interested me are Buddhism and Stoicism. There are a lot of golf psychology books out there that draw from Buddhism (just do a quick Amazon search), but I've not seen any that specifically draw from Stoicism.
So why am I trying to do that? Well, I think Stoicism actually gets a bit misinterpreted and believe there are aspects of the philosophy that are very applicable to golf. After all, golf is life! Most of the golf psychology books I've read (and I've read a lot) have really just been general life psychology books given a golf spin and they blur the lines between psychology and philosophy. Most talk about ways of thinking about your golf game that would be equally applicable to all aspects of your life. Risk-taking, overcoming adversity, moving on from mistakes etc. Personally, I believe that the psychology of my golf game should follow the philosophy I live my life by. Otherwise, I'm surely trying to be two different people on and off the course. As things stand today, this is still my biggest challenge, as despite living my life one way, I'm still prone to forgetting some of those life lessons when I'm golfing. I'm getting better, but there's still a way to go. Marcus Aurelius wouldn't have had so many books of meditations if this was easy!
Life has taught me numerous lessons, but the most important ones have come from periods of adversity. Those rooted in dealing with death or ill health have been the most profound. They are also where the central tenets of stoicism have been most applicable, especially how it considers emotional resilience and dealing with what you can and cannot control. Life will always throw up some unexpected challenges, it's how we deal with them that defines us.
Many people have a misperception about what it means to be a Stoic. The Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius is probably the most famous of the Stoics and fortunately, much of his written work and meditations have survived. His take on Stoic philosophy has been widely written about by others and popularised in movies such as Gladiator. Maximus - I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back". The dictionary describes being stoic as "determined not to complain or show your feelings, especially when something bad happens to you". It's often used to describe a dogged determination in the face of adversity or someone rather dour and emotionless. "That was a stoic performance by Keith, to come back from the triple bogey on 6 and not implode shows real determination". But to me, being stoic means how you live your life, acknowledging your emotions, reflecting on their causes and learning to redirect them for your own good. It's about being the best version of myself as much as possible.
If we can stop being controlled by our emotions then we can remove room for regret, fear or insecurity. Instead, we can find calmness, confidence and security even in times of chaos (or when our ball has just crossed another lateral hazard).
The primary goal of stoicism is eudaimonia - living a happy and flowing life. Being on good terms with your inner/highest self. Around that is the happiness triangle, something equally applicable to golf as it is to life.
"Living with Arete" is about being the best version of yourself in the here and now. Opposite this is Focus on What You Control, which is the most prominent principle in Stoicism. At all times we should focus on the things that are within our control and take the rest as it comes. We can't undo what is already done, so we must make the most of what we have and do the best with it that we can (for a golfing take on this, see the excellent "Golf from Point A", by Suzie Meyers and Valerie Lazar). Historically, this is where I struggled most during my early adult life, trying to control the uncontrollable (and I'm not talking about my cats!) and dwelling on it when I realised I couldn't. Learning to let go of that brought considerable relief. Finally, there is taking responsibility, which is about how we choose to respond to events. As the quote above alludes, it's not events that make us happy or miserable, it's how we choose to interpret them. For me, this was a key component of getting out of that vicious control cycle I described above.
Putting this into a golf context, if you can apply the "happiness triangle" to your life then you can equally apply it to your golf game. This is the philosophic approach I try to bring each time I play. It helps me both on and off the course.
Decide to be a happy/grateful golfer/person
Commit to being the best version of yourself each time you play/every day
Focus on what you can control and don't dwell on the "bad bounce" or the extra shots it took you to get out of the bunker on the seventh/or any other misfortune that may have befallen you today.
Take responsibility for how you choose to respond. Are you going to laugh off the bad shots/luck or are you going to launch your wedge into the bushes and spoil the day not just for yourself, but for your playing partners too? Remember, laughter has some real health benefits, it really makes you live longer.
I'll leave you with one final thought - was the great Bobby Jones the first Stoic golfer?
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